Nobody has complete integrity all of the time.
Life is messy, complicated and unpredictable. No matter how honorable and authentic we purport to be, the reality is, everyone does what they have to do to survive and be happy.
We all work out our own brand of compromise. We all find compartments to put things in that make them okay.
Sometimes we even sell our soul if times are tough and the price is right.
A friend of mine in his sixties once made a poignant observation. He said:
It doesn’t matter if you choose the future that’s cheaper, it only matters if it’s the one you want.
His insight helped me realize something. There is no such thing as settling. That’s just a word people use when life doesn’t match their fantasy.
But that’s the danger in viewing our cement stance as some kind of mark of heroism. We’re so busy congratulating ourselves on our flawless integrity that we actually miss out on many of the unexpected opportunities that would have come our way had our hearts been more malleable.
Besides, the word settling comes from the root sahtlenm, which simply means, to content oneself.
When did we decide that wasn’t enough? When did euphoria become the price of admission for a fulfilling life?
If we ever want to reach that place of enduring contentment with ourselves, we must let go of the need to have things work out our way all the time.
Because without that ability to trust that which is good enough, life becomes an asymptotic death march to an impossible to reach marshmallow fantasyland.
LET ME ASK YA THIS…
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